The push-pull of living in a world where everyone’s at war within themselves
When everyone you meet out in this world, state of madness is like a ticking time bomb. Too much needed to be dealt with on the inside. Too much on the inside have yet to be touched. So they hold their breath and not make a sound and they bleed. They bleed everywhere and on everyone because they cannot face themselves. It’s too hard for them. Too hard to face dead on. Mission impossible. Mission incomplete. Abort the fucking mission now.
Their heart is bleeding all the time. In turn, they act erratically, they act impulsively. They can’t stop the bleeding so they look for someone to bleed upon. And if that someone can’t stop the bleeding, if that someone won’t coddle them, they look and search elsewhere to another madness. Continuing down the same maze, yet still lost. Still lost in what they couldn’t find, because they don’t even know what to look for or what they’re searching for.
Lost and confused because the journey inward has yet to be taken. The journey inward is too long of a journey. Deflect, dismiss, denounce it. No need to look there. So now I show up in the world like a ticking time bomb because I refuse. Refuse to look deeper, refuse to challenge the status quo appearing into my reality. So I take it out, take it out on others. Bestow my pain upon another, like a TV projection screen. Projected upon another that seems more believable, because then people would be convinced that you are not miserable as the way you feel.
God forbid someone actually sees what’s really going on. God forbid that someone can see into me as such. Darvo! Deny, Attack, Reverse the victim and offender so I can keep my fake facade believable. So that I may save myself even if I betray another. Even if that cost me the pain of another. A suitable sacrifice hmmm. Is it victory or is it cowardice disguised and cloaked as victory?
If any victory. A victory short-lived. A short smirk, a short smile and hooray, and yet slowly back into the gut wrenching feeling of misery. An image of victory while you constantly stack the burdens of guilt, of shame to carry along with you. That’s heavy. That’s deep. That’s a load to carry. That’s a cut that burns. But it doesn’t burn away the pain. Only for a moment, but the moment never lasts that long. So you search for another moment.
Is that how you rationalize your power? Are you really the defendant or is it I? To parade power as if power equates to loud and obnoxious. Go ahead. Tell the lie. Lie to yourself. Be the disservice to yourself. You’re hurting no one else, but yourself.
To defend the wrongfully accused without the drain. One must live and embody their truth. You cannot sit here and lie to yourself. You cannot be confused, torn, and double minded. A person lying to themselves is a person no good for no one. Because when the epicenter of the situation of the concern was built on a lie, then everything else attached is also a lie by default.
Long behold the farce. We found it. When we recognize the farce in the complexity we can identify the energy drain. When we find and spot the lie, that is when we find the cause of destruction, the drain so to speak. Alongside that, we can find everything and anything that is attached to that kind of destruction.
That’s also interchangeably to the point of defense. When we pinpoint this spot, this epicenter. Then can we choose to detangle ourselves from the situation. That’s when we find the way out. The way out to peace in one piece. Let them believe the power was in their hands.
When truly the power was always in yours. You just took the time to unravel yourselves quietly or perhaps swiftly. Calling back all the remnants of you that has been stolen. Everything will disintegrate without the core energy presence, you.
No longer feeding into the energy, into the lie, into the chaos that doesn’t have an outlet, therefore creating destruction in all its path. Only to stumble upon your true path.
These are the thieves living among us. And there is no honor amongst thieves. Leave the thieves where they may.
That is defense without the drain attached.
MAXIMA VEGA 